When your Partner is Addicted to Marijuana
In popular culture, marijuana addiction does not seem to carry the life-threatening associations like other forms of substance abuse. But the truth is that smoking weed can be as dangerous to human health not to mention destructive of finances and close relationships. So if you find your partner addicted to weed, here are a few things you can do about it.
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Have a talk
The first thing you need to do in order to deal with your partner’s marijuana addiction is to have a talk about it with him/her. however as you ask for their undivided attention most likely they will already know what the talk is going to be about and might try every trick the book to wriggle out of it. This is behavior typical of an addict and you need to be firm in your request to have a chat. Talking about your partner’s addiction is important because the issue needs to come out in the open and be examined in a rational light and not brought up only in the haze of weed smoke or when you are fighting about dwindling finances. When your partner is clear-headed, it is the right time to ask them what they intend to do about their addiction. In order to make any headway at all in your joint battle against the addiction, first and foremost your partner needs to accept that there is a problem and then make up his/her mind to do something about it. Point out calmly and logically that their addiction is not helping them in any way, neither in their career and relationships nor in their mental and physical health and whether their lives are worth the momentary hallucinations conjured up by smoking pot. Once your partner admits to the problem and decides to kick of the addiction – for good – you can move on to decide what needs to be done thereafter. However avoid resorting to emotional blackmail or you may find your partner smoking pot behind your back or at a co-addict’s place. The decision to give up marijuana has to come from him/her and you can only present the stark truth about their addiction and offer your full support in their efforts to quit.
Get rid of the paraphernalia
However your partner might not be ready to commit an answer then and there. If this happens agree to allow them time to think over things and then have a talk again. Fix the length of this interval at a couple of days at the most. And in the meantime you can agree to get rid of all marijuana related paraphernalia which is also the next step after your partner willingly decides to kick the habit for good. Ask your partner to throw away any remaining marijuana in the house and at the same time toss out smoking devices, rolling papers, incense, cigars and lighters. If there are posters, CDs , DVDS and magazines with references to marijuana, discard them all since these cultural products often have an insidious influence in furthering the addiction. However be careful not to get rid of the stuff in your partner’s absence or without their knowledge. If you find that your partner is reluctant to let go of the stuff, it could mean that he/she is not ready to kick the addiction as yet.
Find other points of interest
In all likelihood, your partner started smoking pot out of sheer boredom or as a way of unwinding. Encourage your partner to take up a hobby with you; this could have to do with things your partner likes - for instance join a couple’s class for Latin dance if he/she has a keen sense of rhythm. Alternatively you could also explore something that he/she has never done before, like taking up a cookery class or trying out bungee jumping. The whole point is to get busy with other enjoyable activities so that your partner has little time and even less inclination to go back to smoking pot. If your partner wants to be on his/her own, encourage them to find other ways to relax and relieve stress like yoga, swimming or hiking instead of smoking weed. Also keep oral substitutes for marijuana smoking handy around the house so that when he/she gets the urge to smoke they can lay their hands on gum, hard candy, herbal cigarettes or even plain toothpicks.
Hang out with like-minded people
The right company can be an invaluable aid in your partner’s attempts to kick marijuana addiction. Hang out with friends and colleagues who you know do not smoke pot and stay away from those that continue to do so. Refuse to give in to emotional blackmail from the latter and find more opportunities to do enjoyable things with the former set. You cannot always keep tabs on what your partner is doing and neither should you. Rather make sure he/she has a clean group of friends to hang out with who will support his/her efforts to quit.
Get professional help
If your partner does not accept that he/she has marijuana addiction, it might be difficult for you to cope by yourself in this relationship. In such a situation the only way out is through professional help. Encourage your partner to see a counselor, a therapist or join a de-addiction program to thrash things through. Substance abuse is too complex a problem to be dealt alone especially if the one engaging in it is in complete denial. And even if your partner is honest about his/her efforts to quit, therapy will act as a valuable support in aiding the process. Seeking professional help becomes even more important when your partner refuses to even see the need for counseling. Under such circumstances, you require help from trained therapists in order to examine your priorities and decide whether it is worth staying in the relationship.
Finally realize that like all kinds of de-addiction processes, your partner’s efforts to quit marijuana smoking will take time. There might be hiccups along the road and even serious bouts of self-questioning for you. Just be there to support your partner in his/her attempts to kick the addiction and in the end all your patience and faith will pay off.
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