How to Meet Men Who Don't Want Kids

Singles bring all sorts of expectations and priorities to the dating game and one of these could well be child-free dating. So if you are a woman who doesn’t want to have kids and are looking to date men who feel likewise, here are a few ways you can meet potential partners.

Have realistic expectations

At the very outset, keep in mind that singles who do not want children at any point in their lives are a minority. Most of them are simply looking for a fulfilling relationship which could well include kids if and when both partners feel ready. Thus it can be a bit more difficult to find a guy who shares your stance on kids because the pool of such singles is smaller than other types of groups. However that doesn’t mean that men with your views are impossible to find! And if finding a child free partner is important to you, and then you must persevere until you find one – just be prepared to go about it with greater patience and positivity.

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Be honest

As you join the dating game, make certain that you never hide your feelings about not wanting children. In a mainstream culture and media strongly biased towards family values, your stance may raise quite a few eyebrows, especially since it comes from a woman who by virtue of her gender is ‘naturally’ assumed to wish to become a mother. Women who do not want kids are still looked upon as deviant or damaged in some way. In fact you may even lose some interested people over this, but it is better to weed them right out at this stage than discover it later in the relationship. You must really understand that not all women or not all men want children. Therefore, there is no point trying to conceal the fact you do not want children, and hope that somehow you end up in a relationship with a medically sterile person or inexplicably bypass the whole thing. At the same time though, avoid the other extreme of making child-free dating the only focus of your socializing. While there is no harm done if you reveal this information at the first opportunity to a potential partner, there is equally no need to announce it as a part of your name: "Hello, I'm such-and-such and I never want children!" You do not necessarily have to bring it up yourself, but if it comes up in the conversation, come clean on your priorities. Also keep in mind the possibility that even if find partners for child-free dating, their reasons might not be the same as yours or they may be open to other arrangements like adoption or being foster parents.

Go online

Now that you are quite clear in your mind about who you are looking for, you need to explore opportunities which attract other like-minded singles. These days one of the best options for this is to sign up with niche dating websites that cater to child-free dating.  On these sites, it is far less likely that you will have to explain your decision to a great length and face many negative attitudes toward it. These sites vary significantly on their general attitude toward children, so look around for one that you feel comfortable with. On the flip side, these sites may have limited numbers of members and you may not be able to find partners who are compatible on other fronts like finances, geography, personal appeal and so on. A useful alternative is to sign up with larger mainstream dating sites which have significantly larger databases of members and where you can clearly mention in your main profile that you are interested in child-free dating. In fact some of the more thorough services use detailed biographical information and personality profiles to match people which is why they often ask whether or not you want to have a family, and how important that issue is to you – that way you are more likely to be matched up with contacts who share your stance on children among other things. However some of the dating services are scams, so be careful when giving out personal information and paying for the service. You can even explore online childfree forums. Although they are meant for general communication, it is not to say you cannot find someone who you would click with on these forums. In fact many of these organize live meetings every now and then which in turn may greatly increase your odds of finding a like-minded person in real life.

Special dating groups

These days there are an increasing number of singles clubs or groups with special focus and one of the most popular ones for child-free dating is No Kidding! Here singles can meet, date and even get married – brought together by the mutual desire of remaining child-free. Join this social group if there is a chapter in your town or city and if there isn’t you can even start one.  If you are looking for child free people, chances are there are others in your community who are looking for the same thing and your initiative could be a great way of meeting other like-minded singles.

Look for ambitious professionals

Professional groups are one of the best places to meet singles who are not interested in having kids. Those that are highly ambitious and career-driven are quite likely to opt out of parenting owing to the demand of their profession. Thus corporate events and business parties could be ideal for looking for partners open to child-free dating. In fact there are some careers which are less suitable for having a family life and successful professionals belonging to these may opt out of having kids. These may involve a great deal of travel as in the case of pilots, salesmen or a high degree of physical danger as for war-journalists or intelligence personnel. Then there are also certain hobbies or interests like wildlife or archaeology which again make having a normal family life difficult; looking into these professional or hobby groups could help you get in touch with guys who are not keen on having kids.

Explore other age groups

If you belong to forty-plus age group or don’t mind dating men older to you, there are many divorced men with grown children who are unlikely to wish to be a father again. Also, once they reach a certain age, people who don’t have children yet are not likely to want them. However dating such a partner may involve you with their families and if you are looking for a more permanent relationship, consider if you are ready to be a step-parent.