Wedding invitation cards - a guide to ordering

A wedding invitation provides your guests an insight as to what to expect of your wedding. It expresses to your guests the style of your wedding - in terms of its formality or informality; grandeur or intimacy - and acts as a lasting souvenir of your special day. A considerable amount of thought, planning and creativity, as well as personal style and preferences go into wedding invitations.

There are many choices available in invitations, whether from a professional store, catalogue, website or do-it-yourself options. There are also many aspects to consider in terms of …

Style of the invitations

Styles can be varied, from third-person formal invitations to semi-formal/ contemporary or even the more intimate, informal invites. The former often follow the traditional black script on cream matt paper, while the last is more personalized, probably handwritten or preprinted on stationery that could match your colour scheme or theme.

Paper colour and weight

Again, it is the formality of your event which would determine the paper shade and weight, from ivory, cream and white in a thicker quality for the more formal and traditional wedding, to varied colours and lighter paper for the more informal events.

Size of the invitation

You could have either a large double sheet folded one, or a smaller single sheet. When selecting your invitation,  do remember that bigger is not always better, as you have to take into account postage charges for the additional weight.

Printing

There are various options for printing, depending once again on the style and formality of your event and your budget.

1. Engraving is the most expensive, traditional and time consuming, with the result showing raised lettering that can be felt on the back of the paper.
2. Thermography also results in raised lettering but the print is shinier than engraved print, does not press through the back of the paper and is less expensive than engraving.
3. Then there are other options like lithography, laser printing and of course the handwritten style.

Accessorizing invitations

There are various options for accessorizing invitations in terms of designs, borders, ribbons, flowers, embossing etc. matching your theme.

Important points of wedding invitation etiquette

Wedding invitations should…

1. Communicate all the vital details of the wedding. The language should be precise, and the meaning clear in terms of date, time and location, as well as, possibly, attire that would be considered appropriate in the case of very formal events that strictly call for a certain dress code.
2. Be separate for children over the age of 18
3. Be traditionally sent out by the bride’s parents, and bear their name, unless the groom’s parents are also shouldering some of the expenses, in which case their names should be included.
4. Preferably avoid using the words ‘and guest’ or ‘and family’ while addressing them. It makes it more personalized if you can mention the name of the guest/ names of the children.

Wedding invitations shouldn’t…

1. Have a wedding gift list enclosed with them. Although guests will almost always bring a gift, it is considered crass and in bad taste to seem like one is prompting for a gift by enclosing a wedding gift list.
2. Mention the gift registry or that you may want cash instead of a gift. Parents or attendants could spread the word, if asked, but you should refrain from doing so yourself.
3. Expressly indicate ‘No children’. The same should be conveyed in the manner in which your invitation is addressed, through the inner envelope and thereby indicate who is included and who is not.
4. Be sent out to second list guests at the last minute because many of your first choice guests have backed out. It will make it obvious to them that they were not your first choice.

Ordering invitations and sending them out

Invitations should ordinarily be sent out about a couple of months prior to the wedding date, or thereabouts, depending on how organized your wedding preparations are and the time you have available between your engagement and wedding date.

If you are planning a wedding during the holiday season, giving guests advance notice by sending out invitations earlier is advisable, to avoid disappointment on both sides.

If you’re planning a destination wedding, a "Save-the-date" card about 6 months in advance would be a good option. Depending on the printing option you choose you will need to factor in sufficient time for printing and delivery of your invitations, inserts and envelopes – it could take up to three months for printing of formal invitations, considerably less for other options. ou also need to keep enough time for addressing invitations.

If you are pressed for time and the printing process is going to affect your schedule, arrange for delivery of the envelopes earlier so that writing out addresses is out of the way. Keeping all this in mind, invitations should be ordered at least 4 months before the wedding, probably earlier, if you are choosing engraving as the printing option.

Invitation checklist

1. Ask for a proof of the invitation from your printer before he prints the entire order. Proofread carefully for printing errors and also that the information is accurate in terms of date, venue and timing.
2. Make sure you order extra invitations and envelopes. You will want a few extra invitations as souvenirs either as personal keepsakes or for your family, as well as to allow for mistakes made while writing out the invitations and addressing the envelopes. Also remember that you will have to send out invitations to your celebrant/pastor, attendants, etc.
3. Order RSVP cards along with invitations, it could save you money. Ask for replies sufficiently in advance, about two weeks before the wedding, to enable you have enough time to intimate caterers, etc. You could have a code or number written on the RSVP, corresponding to an entry in your master guest list, in case a guest’s handwriting is illegible.
4. If you are having invitations printed to your rehearsal dinner and would like them to match the style of your wedding invitations, order those too at the same time.
5. In order to facilitate the procedure of writing out invitations and addressing them, the best option is to have a master guest list handy, complete with titles, names, addresses and other relevant details. Ensure that spellings are correct.
6. Check out the availability of postage stamps. Especially if you’re looking at special ones with a theme, you will need to order them in advance, and in sufficient quantity to include invitations and the RSVPs, as you will need to include pre-paid postage stamped envelopes for the latter. Also ensure that the invitation along with inserts is weighed in advance so that there is sufficient postage affixed on the envelope and they do not get returned.
7. There should be a return address included on your invitation, usually on the back flap of the envelope, for the postal department to be able to return it in case it could not be delivered.