10 Mistakes Women Make with Men

If you have gone out with numerous men and still find yourself single by the end of the day, perhaps you are misjudging some important aspects about how men generally think and behave. Much has been written and said about how the male and female brains are differently wired. While such pop psychology may not always be authentic, because of certain essential differences on how the two sexes think, most women are not even aware what they are doing wrong in a relationship. So here is a brief account of the ten most common mistakes women make with men and what you can do about it.

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Trying to change him

Now that you have got your man, don’t take this as a green signal for your mission to turn him into a ‘better’ or ‘smarter’ guy. Keep in mind that it was because of his individual quirks and qualities that you found him attractive in the first place. No man wants to change overnight from an object of love to a project of reformation. Most importantly, constant criticism and nagging will not get your man to change. The most it will do is push him even farther away from you. So either learn to love him for who he truly is, or let him go.

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Overanalyzing each emotion

Men often complain that the fairer sex has a gift for reading volumes into perfectly trivial things. And truly, over-analysis can spell doom for a relationship that was completely healthy to begin with. So try to stop obsessing over why your boyfriend called you fewer times today as compared to yesterday. Or why he should want to have the ice-cream before dinner rather than after. Most of the times the frequency of phone-calls and text messages or personal quirks are not meant as a subliminal message for you; overanalyzing every simple thing will lead to a stressful atmosphere and sooner or later, your partner will want to move away.
 

Too much affection, too early

This is one of the most common mistakes that women make with men in the early stages of a relationship. Granted that you have at long last found the man of your dreams, but declaring how much you love him and how you cannot live without him on your first or second date will only serve to scare him away. Keep your expressions of love for when you have received definite signals of interest from him or even better, let the romantic avowal come from him first. Women who are too effusive in their affections are usually perceived by men as needy at best or forward at worst.


 

Being sentimental

Even if you are dating a guy exclusively, try not to be bogged down by Hollywood notions of what courting should be like. Buying him heart-shaped balloons, showing up at his workplace every other day or crashing his inbox with soppy messages are likely to bore him over a period of time. Initially your partner may be amused or even touched by your mushy gestures but eventually these will become a cause for embarrassment or even irritation. So keep your expressions of love simple and meaningful – don’t overdo them and be sure to respect his professional hours.
 

Trying to change for him

Just like it is no good trying to change a guy to fit your idealistic notions of what a partner should be like, so it is quite useless to try and change yourself to appeal to a man. Keep in mind that if he likes you, it is because he is attracted to the qualities that you already possess and not because he sees in you the potential for developing other qualities. Also if you present yourself in a radically different way in the beginning and then do an about turn three months into the relationship, there is little doubt the guy will feel cheated and want to move away. Having said that, there are indeed some men who would encourage you to conform to their expectations of an ideal woman in return for promise of a relationship. But before you stop being yourself, consider what good is such a man who doesn’t love and respect for the person you are, but rather is in love with a false idea or image.
 

Shirking from his interests

It is understandable if you don’t want to spend your precious weekend watching a football match or out on the golf course. But if you take absolutely no interest in any of your guy’s hobbies, there is bound to be a growing distance between you two. Relationships are all about give and take; think of the many times he agreed to go shopping with you or settled for the chick-flick because you want to watch it so badly. So every now and then, try to show some interest in your partner’s interests or at least let him know that you support what he likes to do.
 

Being possessive

It is a mistake if you think that being possessive is a sign of extreme love. Most guys do not appreciate their partners throwing a tantrum if they respond to a call from an ex, or go out with the boys once a week. Even though such intensity of emotions may seem pretty flattering at the beginning of a relationship, over time it may get on a guy’s nerves. Apart from the obvious implication that you don’t trust him, your possessive behavior could also indicate your own emotional insecurity.
 

Snooping among his belongings

Another sign of lack of trust that upsets men is being spied upon by their partners. Women who check their man’s cell phone for strange numbers or for provocative text messages are committing a serious error. If you don’t trust your man enough to let him have some privacy, then maybe you need to get out of the relationship or perhaps to re-examine your values.
 

Talking about ex-boyfriends

It is understandable that you want to share your past with your current partner, but really is it necessary to go into minute details about what your ex preferred drink at parties or even wear in bed. No man likes to hear about another guy’s failures or worse, his successes. Also as long as you keep talking about your exes, it will appear that you are obsessing about the past and not ready to move on.
 

Letting yourself go

Even if you have been in a relationship for quite some time, this is no reason for you to settle for a tired, run down appearance. Men are visual by nature and they like to see their partners maintain their physical attraction. So sign up at the gym if you have put on weight or make an appointment at the salon in order to get back that glow. And once you are looking and feeling good about yourself, you can bet others will be attracted too.