How to Make your Ex-Wife Miss You?

Human emotions are as tricky as they come. So even after you have gone through a whole deal of trouble to divorce your wife, you may stumble upon the realization that your ex still figures in your thoughts. If you want her to feel the same about you, here are a few tips on making your ex-wife miss you.

Face facts

The first step to making your ex-wife miss you is to come to grips with the situation yourself. Accept that there has been a breach in the relationship and your divorce is a consequence of that. You simply cannot go back to being the couple you were in the beginning and the breakup, no matter whose fault it was, will require you to start anew if you wish to attract your ex to yourself again. If you keep struggling against reality and refuse to accept it, you are losing out even before you have begun.

Get back with your ex with this step-by-step guide.

Display a mature outlook

The break-up of a marriage is an exceedingly traumatic experience, more so if it has been forced on you. But pleading with or making a scene before your ex-wife will simply not help. In fact if you throw tantrums or emotionally blackmail her on account of children, you will only come off as needy and she in turn may respond by moving further away from you.  So even if the break up has not been caused by you, take it calmly and with an air of self-assurance. Your ex-wife will be impressed by your emotional maturity and very likely remember this in future. On the other hand, if the break-up has been your fault, apologize quickly, sincerely and then let her have her say.

Put in some distance

In order to make your ex-wife miss you, you need to pull away for a while. If the break-up is fairly recent, say a week, make it a point not to have any contact with her for a month or so. If you keep calling her up and wanting to meet up, you will only make yourself come across as needy and nothing turns off a woman as quickly as a man who is clingy and emotionally weak. On the other hand, if you can successfully stay away for some time, she will not only be secretly impressed by your sense of independence and self-confidence but is likelier to miss you. Even if your ex-wife calls you up or asks to meet you, play hard-to-get for a while so that she really feels your absence in her life.

However things can get a bit tricky if you have kids and are expected to follow a visitation schedule. Try and put off coming face-to-face with your ex wife for a while; but if you cannot entirely avoid meeting her while seeing the kids, let your encounters – with your ex – be brief and breezy. Avoid hanging around her place and taking a long while to say goodbye to the kids. Discuss any issues about the children that your ex may bring up but be matter-of-fact and then leave quickly.

Work on your image

As spouses settle down into a marriage, most of them become less careful about their appearance. They feel now that they have married the person they loved, they need not work at looking great all the time. If the same is true of you, then spruce yourself up a little bit. Get a makeover if you can afford it. Even getting a new hairstyle or an updated wardrobe may work wonders. Exercise regularly and it will not only help you to get a new well-toned look but also be good for your health in the long run. Along with working on your appearance, enhance your personality too. Join up for a new course if you have the time or at least get involved in an interesting hobby. Learning newer things will raise your confidence and help you widen your intellectual horizons. So when you do meet your ex-wife, she will not only be impressed by the newer, smarter you but maybe start obsessing about the change in private.

Get a life

All the while that you have been restricting contact with your ex-wife, make sure she knows that you are having a great time socially. Go out a lot, be seen everywhere having fun or at least looking like you are fine with the break. Renew contact with old friends, common acquaintances and meet them regularly; sooner or later word will travel to your ex that you have become a regular fixture on the social scene. Once she sees you around or hears about you having a good time, she will start wishing she were part of it as well. At the same time, don’t go overboard with your social impulses; avoid visiting strip clubs, swing parties and openly dating other women or your ex will feel justified by the divorce and sign you off as a waste of time.

Send out feelers

After some time spent apart, let drop small hints to your ex-wife that you have been thinking of her. While you want her to know that you have got your life back, at the same time you don’t want her to believe that you have moved on romantically. This may lead her to begin dating other men too and then the odds of her missing you are bound to go down. So find small ways to let your ex know she still figures in your thoughts. For instance send her a short mail saying how you watched a movie that used to her favorite and then thought of her. However make sure to keep these correspondences light and casual and don’t go into detailed flashbacks or she might get wary at the thought of coming back together.

Take advantage of your shared past

You already have the advantage of sharing a life together and so use it to the hilt to making your ex miss you. Be the person she fell for in the first place. For instance if she was attracted to your sense of humor, be cheerful and positive when she is around. Also ask about common acquaintances or casually reminisce about happy times spent together. These will make her aware that you had a lovely thing going in the past and will naturally start thinking more and more about you.

In all your attempts though, keep in mind that you cannot compel a person to feel in a particular way. If your ex was exceedingly unhappy in the marriage, then it is only natural that after the divorce, she will want to move on. On the other hand, if the divorce was a hasty decision and you believe that deep down she is the one for you, making her miss you is only the first step to a long, complex road to reconciliation. And yet, in whatever you do, it is best to be guided by honest emotions - in fact motivations like revenge or wanting to hurt another person are signs that you should instead focus on your own emotional and psychological health.