How to Meet and Date a Younger Man

Cougar relationships seem to have become a trend now with mature women increasingly going out with men several years their junior. While they have existed earlier too – think Raquel Welch and Mae West - perhaps it is now that they are becoming mainstream with more women achieving financial success and celebrity cougar relationships in Hollywood coming into the limelight. If you too are keen to meet and date younger men, here are a few ways to go about it.

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Sign up for a course

One of the best ways of meeting younger men is to go where they can be found in greater numbers for instance at a college or university. So if you have been thinking of doing a refresher course to keep up with the latest developments in your profession or even take up a new course to learn about something that always interested you, this may be the right time. Going to college and attending classes will throw you in the company of guys who are young and many of them may be interested in going out with a smart and mature woman as you.

Hang out where they do

Towns and cities with colleges and other institutions of higher education have large numbers of young people; so frequent bars and pubs in such towns which are popular with the younger crowd. These may not be the high-end cocktail bars and nightclubs you are used to since the younger men may not have so much money to burn. Instead look for cafes and discos where the younger lot is more likely to hang out on account of reasonably-priced fare as well proximity to campuses. Also keep in mind the hours that these guys are likely to keep – for instance having a latte at ten in the morning, you may not find a café buzzing with action since most of its young patrons will be away at classes. Instead evenings and weekends are more likely to be packed with young guys looking to have a good time. Other good options of coming across young guys are campus libraries, the stadium on games nights as well as the neighborhood bowling alley.

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The gym

Fitness centers like the gym have long been a popular way to bring together singles from both sexes. And with young men eager to keep their bodies fit and toned, you have a fair chance to bump into a young fitness enthusiast at your gym. Apart from the fact that getting a gym membership will allow you to chat up young hunk on the treadmill next to you, it will also encourage you to exercise regularly – a must for women with advancing years.

Pursue special interests

One of the best ways to meet a partner is to do things that interest you. Think about people, places, objects, issues, careers, organizations, and hobbies that you are passionate about. Join a hobby club which has members from varied age groups. It may be a society for book lovers, photographers, avid hikers or anything that brings people together from different parts of the age spectrum. Better still sign up with a special interest society which is more likely to have younger members like perhaps a dance class or an amateur dramatics society. Be guided by your own interests because if others see you having a good time, they will be interested in joining you. Finally whether or not you meet the right men you are sure to learn something new and interesting.

Get online

The internet has emerged as one of the most effective dating tools, bringing together singles not only on the basis of mutual interests and priorities but also catering to specific types of relationships and one of these is cougar dating. Today there is a plethora of dating sites which offer a platform for older women and younger men to get to know each other. The advantage of these sites is that members already know what is expected of them and they need to mask their intentions as anything else or beat around the bush. Alternatively you can also sign with larger, more popular dating sites but make sure that you are clear about your choice of partner from the very start so that you can attract the right kind of dates. At the same time surf the internet for cougar dating events taking place in your town or city; these days speed dating events, special nights at bars and nightclubs and even cruises are organized to bring together older women and younger men and which can be an ideal way to hook up with a hunk of your choice.

Dress carefully

Once you have got a date with a younger man, it is important to dress carefully. For the first date, it is best that you dress attractively but not provocatively. Opt for something like a black or red dress that flatters your figure but does not show too much skin. You may be tempted to compete with younger women, but keep off low-waist jeans and miniskirts, at least on your early dates. If you are not too sure of a figure-hugging dress, keep the look classy by teaming your outfit with a smart jacket and stilettos. Add sheer stockings and possibly one item of expensive jewelry that takes the style quotient several notches higher. However don’t go for chunky jewelry, heavy makeup or load on that perfume. At the same time though, get a manicure and ditch the glasses for contact lenses.

Act and look confident

Whether you are aiming for the cool sophisticated look or the hot sultry image, by no means should you appear nervous before your date. Since you are far from a love-struck teen, you need to show that you in control of your emotions. So avoid doing things which display nervousness and anxiety like fidgeting with your purse, hair, cell phone, crossing and uncrossing your legs or simply moving about too much. If you don’t know what to do with your hands, just cup them together in your lap and keep them there when you are not eating.

What to talk about

This is a crucial part of any date and could mean the difference between seeing the guy again and staring at a phone that would not ring. When dating a younger guy, by all means be the one to break the ice. After all he is less experienced than you and bound to be more nervous. As you meet say hello warmly, smile and compliment him. If it is your first date, it is best to restrict the conversation to finding out more about each other. Ask your date about him, what he does for a living, what activities he is involved in and if he has children, ask him about them too. However keep the tone light and casual – don’t appear to be interrogating him, instead let the questions signal your interest. At the same time, strive for a balance in the conversation by telling him a bit about yourself too. But don’t go overboard and give out your life history – this is way too early for that. Also avoid talking about your former spouses and partners. If he asks about your previous relationships, be truthful but brief – this topic should be left for conversations when you know each other better and are pursuing a relationship.

Finally, never appear needy when dating a younger man. Very often insecurity over advancing years and waning looks may lead a person to date someone several years younger. You may feel that you possibly cannot look your years if you can attract and even hold the attentions of such an attractive under-25 lover. But no matter how young and inexperienced your date might be, he will invariably pick up any hint of neediness on your part and that can prove disastrous for a relationship. Your neediness may scare him away or worse tempt your partner to misuse your insecurity for material advantage. Cougar dating works best when you are strong and assured from within – you don’t need his youth to make you feel better about yourself; you are interested since it offers a mutually enjoyable relationship to both.