Cougar dating - How to Compete with Younger Women

As more women in their forties and above discover the joys of dating younger men, competition is bound to hot up for the youthful, groovy guys. If you are thinking of heading the way of cougar dating too, you need to buck up for stiff competition from another quarter – women who are younger or closer in age to the guy you have your eye on. Here are a few tips on preparing yourself for the competition and winning it too.

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Get a look that is right for you

A taut body and youthful skin are perhaps the main advantages that younger women have over cougars who are interested in catching the attention of young men. However it is just as easy to come up with a look of your own that will work wonders for your social life. By all means do what you can to achieve a youthful look and this includes trying out the whole range of anti-aging creams and serums to cosmetic surgery. At the same time though cultivate a personal style that will play down your defects while highlighting your assets. For instance if you are proud of your gym-toned boy, go for figure-hugging dresses; on the other hand if you wish to downplay your pear-shaped body, wear soft-flowing dresses and instead play up your plus points like a thick mane of hair. Most of all don’t copy blindly what younger women are wearing – jeans which perch precariously atop the crotch and jackets neon colors may very well be favored by teens but would hardly be the right look for a forty-plus woman. Instead go for cuts, fabrics and styles that are more appropriate to your age but at the same time make it point to stay atop of fashions and don't appear too frumpy. Instead adopt a personal style that exudes class and sophistication – that way you need not compete with younger women in the looks department and yet you would manage to stand out of the crowd.

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Be prepared for uncomfortable situations

Sometimes competition from a younger woman may not be about superficial thing as looks but take on a more insidious form. If a girl has eyes on your cub, she may take recourse to other things like a shared knowledge about interests of their own generation, to get his attention away from you and focus on to her. For instance at a party, your cub’s college mate or co-worker at the burger joint may start talking about some new band or film that they both are familiar with and you know nothing about. Instead of appearing to fume and fret on such an occasion, you can smile sweetly, suggestively pat his shoulder and buy a round of drinks. At the same time it will definitely help to familiarize yourself with cultural products popular with your cub’s generation. But even as you embrace his kind of music and sports, make it a point to introduce him to some of yours – you will not only come off as knowledgeable and multi-layered personality but he too will have fun discovering new things with you. Again if you find your cub flirting with younger women at a party or dinner, go off and talk to an older man or the hunk of a bartender. This will almost certainly make your young date shake off all the kitty attention and come looking for you.

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Learn to deal with snide remarks

An essential part of learning to compete with younger women is to know how to deal with hurtful remarks about your age and the disparity with your cub. Such comments could range from apparently innocuous ones like, “What a lovely dress – my mother has one just like it” to outright vicious ones like “he must be after your money”. No matter how tempted you are to get drawn into a catfight, keep in mind that the trick is not to get angry or upset. After all a spluttering and flustered cougar is not only unattractive too look at, but will be just the reaction your younger rival was trying to get out of you. Instead you can come up with a line that will show up your competitor for the greenhorn that she is like asking her who her favorite writer or thinker is and why. If that does not stump her into silence you can make an equally catty comment on her age like smiling sweetly and asking, “Isn’t it a school night?” Sometimes though it may be better to avoid a confrontation which is when you can tap lightly on your date’s shoulder and invite him to come and meet some friends of yours. In fact once in a while it may be best to simply ignore a competitor who is trying hard to edge you out of a conversation. Let her hold the fort and sooner or later she will end up making a fool of herself while you will come out as the classy, mature one.

Make him feel special

Yet another advantage that younger women sometimes have is of appearing less threatening to a guy’s ego. Being roughly of the same age as your cub or even younger, such women find it easier to let him be the one in control. Younger guys thus find such girlfriends more appeasing and less challenging. Under such circumstances, if you push too hard, you may come off as controlling and even authoritarian, seeking to wear the pants in the relationship. So try and be more mindful of your younger date’s priorities and schedule instead of insisting on having your way every time. Also resist the temptation to correct his inexperience all the time. A series of "I told you so" can strain a relationship and your cub may find the company of younger woman less judgmental and thus more welcoming. In the end you need to tread a fine line between exercising your independence but at the same time not appearing too pushy. Above all keep in mind that a self-assured, sexually aware and widely knowledgeable personality is the main attraction of a cougar partner, which is not easy to find in younger women.