Dating an INTJ Personality Type

The INTJ personality type according to the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator stands for the keywords Introversion, Intuition, Thinking and Judging. People belonging to this personality group have highly original and independent minds as well as loyal and driven in a relationship. So if you are dating an INTJ here are few points to help you through.

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Highlight your respect for competence

One of the most distinctive personality traits of an INTJ is the high value they place on competence. Their Intuitive sense enables them to quickly notice patterns in external events and on their basis come up with long range explanatory perspectives. This makes them extremely adept at recognizing and solving tasks with a nimble understanding and utilization of all available resources. Thus if you are planning a date with your INTJ partner, look for activities which will allow them to display their love of competence. A wine-tasting event for instance could bring out the expert in them or attending a scientific convention together will allow them to display their wide-ranging knowledge.

Brush up your own intellect

While it is not necessary that you are able to defeat or at least match your INTJ partner, clause for clause, on the finer points of criminal law or metaphysical discussion, it will certainly help if you can give evidence of an eager intellect. Engage your INTJ lover in a rousing debate on the pros and cons of Utilitarian philosophy or invite him/her to a game of chess at your place. On the other hand if you have been taking him/her to a ballgame for three evenings in a row or spend the entire weekend doing the rounds of nightclubs in your town, you are unlikely to hear from your INTJ partner again. Sometimes an INTJ’s intellectual pre-occupations can seem rather arid or you may feel worn down by repeated attempts to prove yourself as intellectually compatible. At these times remember that INTJs are used to setting high standards for themselves which often makes them expect perfectionism and competence from those close to them as well. Once you are able to engage an INTJ intellectually, you have greater chances of impressing them as a date and even as a potential long-term partner.

Use Logic to understand an INTJ

The Thinking aspect of the INTJ personality type is responsible for making them rational and extremely grounded human beings to the extent that they can seem unemotional and even cold-hearted. However if you really want to reach out to them, use logic and reasoning instead of giving way to tears and tantrums. Say you are tired of going to exhibitions and museums on your dates and would like a romantic boat ride for once. Instead of displaying unreasonable behavior like hysterics and engaging in wild accusations of your partner being an unromantic boor, try to adopt a calm attitude and put forward a well thought-out proposition for a change in dating venue. You will not only get your partner to understand your preference but even impress him/her with your way of solving issues.

Let them take their time

The Introverted nature of an INTJ means that they are giving into analyzing everything around them and this includes your relationship too. So if you begin to feel impatient with your partner and wonder what is taking them so long to open up to you, try to dig into all your reserves of patience. This is because before they come to any decision, INTJs need to think through the entire matter and examine it from all possible angles. However the good part about letting your partner take their time is that once they are sure that it is you who they want to be with, they will rarely change their stand or develop cold feet. On the other hand if you rush them before they are ready, INTJs are perfectly capable of shutting you out. This is also one reason why in a relationship with INTJs, physical intimacy should be attempted only after establishing mental and emotional compatibility and not forced on them prematurely.

Accept their tendency to analyze

The combined effect of the Thinking and Judging aspects of an INTJ personality means that they are given to analyzing a great deal, perhaps even exasperating you with their obsessive concern with explanations and theories. Sometimes a person just wants to enjoy a quiet night under the stars with a beloved without having to listen to explanations of astronomical phenomena or the chemical composition of various heavenly bodies. However if you keep in mind that this is how an INTJ makes sense of the world around them and that this is precisely what gives them the famed insight into problems and how they can be solved, you will begin to accept and even be prouder of their intellectual pre-occupations.

Be loyal

Partners of the INTJ type tend to place a great premium on loyalty and steady, meaningful relationships. Despite being good conservationists or even having a worldly nature they are unlikely to find satisfaction from casual flings or one-night stands. Also because of their Intuitive natures, they have almost an uncanny sense of who is not going to do for them as potential partners. This sometimes makes them come off as arrogant or self-contained when in reality they are being insightful and honest. So despite the stoic and reserved demeanor that INTJs present most of the times, their hearts are capable of feeling deep emotions. If you are interested in an INTJ person, make sure you know your mind and are not simply looking for a way to kill time. Once you find your soul mate in an INTJ and are let into their private world, you will be pleasantly surprised by their unswerving commitment and the intensity of their feelings.