Dating an ISFJ Personality Type

The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator identifies the ISFJ personality as quiet, friendly and conscientious. Here the keywords are Introversion, Sensing, Feeling and Judging which make for partners who are caring, sensitive and loyal even though sometimes they may seem overly concerned with details. Here are a few things to keep in mind when dating an IFSJ type.]

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Tread gently

The main point of differentiation between an ISFJ and the closely-related ISTJ type lies in the opposing keywords, Feeling and Thinking. While making decisions, an ISTJ personality is likely to put more emphasis on objective principles and impersonal facts whereas an ISFJ personality would lay greater store by the feelings and concerns of the people involved. So if you are interested in impressing a guy or girl of this personality type, make sure you are careful of their feelings. Treat them with as much love, tenderness and respect as you can. Always be emotionally available like sharing in their joy when they have achieved something or offering a supportive shoulder when they are feeling blue. If you do on any occasion come off as insensitive, brash or uncaring, it might be quite some time again you may be allowed into their world again.

Be mindful or how you treat others

The importance that people of the ISFJ type place on feelings makes them caring and gentle not only in their romantic relationships but also quite conscientious where others are concerned. People - their feelings and points-of-view – are quite important for ISFJs and they dislike those who roughshod on others or are unmindful of how others feel. So when out on a date with an ISFJ partner be careful of how you treat the waitress at a restaurant or an usher at the concert. In fact the ISFJ type is particularly compassionate to those who are in a less fortunate or less strong position like the kids, the sick, the elderly or animals that are wounded. Coming off as rude or petty may create a bad impression on your ISFJ partner which you might find difficult to remedy later.

Appeal to their romantic side

The easiest way perhaps to the heart of an ISFJ partner is the old-fashioned one. Court them in as many romantic ways as you can. Woo your beloved with flowers and chocolates or with drives on moonlit nights and walks on the beach. Snuggle up with your sweetie by the fireplace while you have some soft music playing in the background. While many of these activities may seem clichéd and well-worn to you, for all those belonging to the ISFJ type, they are important ways of feeling cherished and cared for in a relationship.

Don’t rush them

Despite their love of romance, don’t assume that your IFSJ partner would settle for some heavy intimacy the very next night you go out after a moonlit picnic on the beach. The first keyword in their personality type stands for Introversion which indicates their tendency to think things through until they are quite sure that this is how they want them to be. At times the tendency towards Introversion may be misconstrued for fear of intimacy or lack of commitment but it is really an ISFJ’s way of being certain of what they want so that when the time of reckoning comes, there are no second thoughts. So if you are still getting to know each other, go slow in matters of sex. Give them enough time and space to be sure of what they want and once they resolve these thoughts in their mind, then you will be pleasantly surprised to find them some of the most caring and delightful lovers.

Highlight your familial side

When dating someone of the ISFJ type, don’t forget to accentuate your love for the family. Show how much you care about that old eccentric uncle of yours and how you never forget to send gift checks to your favorite nephew and nieces on Christmas. At the outset of your relationship, refrain from strongly blaming a parent or sibling even though you may have had an unhappy childhood. For an ISFJ, family bonds are rather important because of their twin beliefs in the value of duty as well as their in their need for maintaining harmony in relationships.

Keep your commitments

People of the ISFJ category have a strong sense of duty which is indicated by the ‘Judging’ keyword in their personality type. They are not only thorough and painstaking when given a job but are highly committed and steady in meeting their obligations. This is evident in both their personal as well as professional lives. So if you have made a date with your ISFJ partner, be sure to turn up and well on time. Later excuses like you couldn’t decide what to wear or your gang’s insistence that you have another drink before you leave are unlikely to go down well with an ISFJ personality type. In fact a fib to your boss that you are caught in traffic when you are actually with your IFSJ date would make him/her wary even if the lie was for the sake of being with you.

Give concrete evidence of your love

Just because feelings are important to people of the ISFJ type, it does not follow that they are impractical or merely theoretical. The Sensing keyword in their personality type ensures that they give attention to the practical and the actual. Thus you will be able to go further with your ISFJ date if you express your love in the form home-baked cookies for him or a floral perfume for her rather than realms of love-poetry written or plans of a future vacation with your partner. The Sensing aspect of this personality type is also revealed in their close attention to details and their partiality towards exactitude, sometimes much to the annoyance of those who don’t see what the fuss is all about. Your ISFJ partner might surprise you by being able to recall the color of your socks or handbag on your first date. Thus it is important that you refrain from giving any evidence of slovenliness, whether in appearance, thought or behavior if you are keen to keep your ISFJ partner for life.